|Success Attraction suc·cess: (n.) The achievement of something desired, planned, or attempted|
|Secret To Getting Anything?|
Personal Excellence: Whats Your Motivation? (Part 3 of 3)
After 13 years of being married to the same woman and working for the same employer, I had a crisis in motivation. My marriage, ended in an unmitigated emotional and financial disaster. In short order, my career path went awry as I was 'reorganized' out of a job. My life seemed to be a study in chaos and failure. I felt somehow cheated. At 38, I was too young to quit, but felt too old to start over. I'd strived to be the devoted husband, model citizen, the über employee. Still, I lost. Or did I? How was I measuring success? Weren't my efforts to be my best worthwhile? These are questions most of us will struggle with a few times in our lives. How we answer them will either fuel us for further progress or immolate us in a bonfire of self defeatism.
Dan Marino never won a championship. In pee wee, high school, college, or professional football, 'Dan the Man' never won it all. How is that possible that the greatest quarterback ever to pick up a football retired without "the ring"? How in the cosmic order, could a person excel so well at what he does and come up empty-handed? How then, can success or greatness be defined?
"It's not whether you win or lose, it's how you play the game." To anybody who's ever really competed in anything, that aphorism is as hollow as a jack-o-lantern. We all want to win. We're hardwired for it. The traditional model of winning always involves direct competition. Today, though, 'winning' has morphed into beating countless, faceless 'others' in anything--having the hottest relationship, most impressive title, or the most money in the bank.
The truth is, however, we all don't get to drink from the victors' cup. This reality should encourage us to consider motivations that transcend besting others.
Personal excellence is a more consistent and accessible motivator because it comes from within. Achieving excellence in the pursuit of our goals isn't about the mark others set. Excelling is about us reaching our own best marks. When you excel, you win the only game worth playing.
When I was 22, I was with presented a definition of success that forever changed my outlook. "Success is the progressive realization of worthy goals." How revolutionary! You mean that I wasn't a success only when completed to goal, but while I still was attaining it? This meant for me that success was no longer tied to winning the race, or even finishing it. Success and winning were about running the best race that I could.
Could it be that easy? Why not? You can have abundance and joy in your life by setting your bar as high as you can dream and excelling at your own game. There's no competition, but infinite rewards. By this personal standard, I had two successful 13-year runs. The marriage may have ended, but I stayed committed and remain a loving father and loyal friend. The career my have taken a surprising turn, but I added value to the organization and still do my work and serve my customers with distinction. Score: Me:2 Other People's Standards: 0. Game. Set. Match.
Most football fans know that Dan "the Man's" records will last the ages. When asked what drove him to play so well for so long, his answer was simple and profound. He loves to throw balls. The actual act of launching a ball the best he could was his greatest motivator. It's amazing what towers we can build from the most humble of stones. When we pursue our passion, we find our purpose and become great along the way. The world may never see it, but we become champions nonetheless, enshrined forever in the halls of destiny.
David L. Cole is a speaker, trainer, and writer who empowers people seeking personal excellence, professional distinction, and positive social change.
He earned a Masters Degree in Educational Leadership and spent 13 years as a higher education professional. Currently he provides principle-based training through keynotes, workshops, and coaching. David helps individuals, organizations, and communities enhance their roles as scholars, leaders and citizens.
You can find out more about his work at http://DavidLCole.com
You can reach David at firstname.lastname@example.org
Reach Your Goals - Give Back
Make The Second Half The Best Half
Something happens when you come to the intersection called mid-life; you can look back in retrospect and see your life from an entirely different context. For many this mid-life review brings about a sense of urgency that ignites what is formally called "the mid-life crisis". It's where we can trace the effects back to causes that were initiated by our own poor decision, our inattention to important details, our recklessness, our fear, our misplaced priorities, and our ignorance. It can be a pretty bleak experience to really understand, maybe for the first time, that your life really could have been much better if you only knew then what you know now. Ah but there is a subtle sweetness in enduring the emotional upheaval of a mid-life review and that is the fact that you can decide that the second half will be the best half. You can garner the lessons from your past life by taking the knowledge and the wisdom, and leaving the rest behind. You may also experience grief, regret, anger, and blame. Whatever gut-wrenching emotions you feel should be acknowledged and then gently released. You can choose rather you will continue down your current path or if you will choose a new direction for your life. By consciously deciding how you will live the rest of your life, you can create a life that is extraordinary. It's a mighty sweet deal when you think about it but how do you make it happen? Here is a 5-point plan that you can customize and implement in 2 to 5 years that will make the next 40 mean more than you could possibly imagine. Step 1. Create a life vision, not fantasy, that is worth living into that includes personal, professional, and spiritual growth, leveraging your abilities, gifts, and life experiences, contributing to others, having accomplishments that take you beyond lifestyle and status, and building relationships that are life-enhancing. Step 2. Form alliances with those who walk in front of you, beside you, and behind you. There are those who will be teachers and role models in your life, those who will be companions and friends, and those who will be students. Honor each type of relationship for they will all help you advance in life. Step 3. Remove barriers to success by installing new personal qualities, beliefs, habits, skills, and relationships as required. Learn to observe your sticking points, your hot buttons, your negative patterns and work to dismantle them one by one with the understanding that this is a lifetime commitment that requires diligence, patience, and self-care. Step 4. Learn to fan the fires of your own burning desire. Replenish and renew yourself in healthy ways and learn to balance the various aspects of your life so that you are left feeling whole. Step 5. Stay in the game and expect to win. Know that the Universe is on your side and life embraces and supports evolution and you are playing a critical role in your own personal evolution. Why should you expect to spend at least 2 years in this redesign process? Society has programmed us to expect glorified results instantly but upon closer examination, it becomes obvious that the value of a microwave life is commensurate with the investment of time, energy, and resources. The value of life is not just measured by outcomes but also by the process that produces those outcomes. In other words, the joy of living?is living. In 2 to 5 years you will discover aspects of yourself that reveal your true brilliance. You will shed many false perceptions that have restricted and confined you. The rigorous work you will do will be accompanied by a manifold of rewards; expected and unexpected. Of course, it could happen in less time because the time it actually takes is totally dependant on how much you resist change and how willing you are leave the your herded existence behind. You see, a great life is available to the masses but the masses will not forsake their average existence to claim their inheritance. To create an extraordinary life requires that we learn from our mistakes and our victories and continuously reexamine our personal paradigms adjusting them as needed. When you are making the second half the best half, you will find that you will be in a constant state of personal evolution. As you move toward your life's purpose your envisioned life will become the master plan that will guide your life's choices if it has been carefully designed to holistically reflect your individual uniqueness, which is woven into the expression of your values, contributions, and priorities.
Reach Your Goals - Temp Your Way To The Top
Temp your way to the top
Affirm Your Intentions - Achieve Your Goals
Affirmations are emotionally driven statements of intention and faith that guide thought and action. Affirmation comes from the Latin firmus, meaning strong. Affirmations recognize and assert the existence of personal truths. These statements can be powerfully effective for developing and strengthening thought patterns, and thus actions, needed to achieve goals. These thought patterns also attract the situations we affirm to be true.
Moving to the Other Side of Box
Few books have impacted my perspective on human psychologically and behavior. A little over a year ago I read a book by Dr. Martin Seligman called, "Learned Optimism". Seligman was intrigued by an experiment he had witnessed involving dogs who exhibited inexplicable behaviors. His curiosity led him to create the "Shuttle box" experiment. Without going into great detail, the two-phased experiment went along these lines.
The Reasons Why We Fear Success
In the book, The SHOCKwealth System?, it is discussed that there are four fears that must be overcome in order to experience true success. One of those fears is the fear of success itself. The Fear Of Success is the self-sabotaging fear.
Busy Beavers Build Piles Of Sticks
"Well, you're just a busy beaver, aren't you?" You've either heard or used this cliche, but what do you know about beavers? Let me tell you about something I learned.
Attitude Is The Key To Success
We all want success in life. We want success in our home life, business life, and in our relationships with others. The most important single factor that guarantees our success in every aspect of our lives is having a positive attitude. Without a positive attitude success is not possible. Earl Nightingale call attitude "the magic word."
Run Towards Fear: A Prescription for Success
Fear, or negative anxiety, is the modern day bubonic plague, infecting millions upon millions of people. It spreads with viral effect, and leaves behind consequences of mediocrity and regret. This "plague" is partly due to societal influences (particularly in a post-9/11 era) and partly due to individual issues (the tendency to avoid confrontation of that which we fear). However, whatever the cause, a vaccine is available, and it takes the form of moving towards that which we are most afraid of. Immediately.
Who Makes You Better?
Commit yourself to spending time only with people who are working to have a good life. Negative or lazy people will discourage you and bring you down to their level. As an old English saying goes,
Scientific Discovery Reveals How You Can Live Better Forever
If you are not experiencing perfect, harmonious, pressure-free life experiences right now, it is because there are some unresolved problems in your world that are preventing it from happening. Simple logic compels the conclusion that if you could somehow resolve these problems, harmony would be restored.
Change Your Thinking -- Change Your Life!
The only thing in life we have direct control over is our thoughts and our thoughts determine how we experience life.
The 101 Habits of Highly Successful People
Personal missions statements (PMS) are just nothing but the winning choices. Our mind can program us in such a way that success ratio in personal, social & professional life changes drastically.
Is Success About Money?
Success could be just about making money, but I think it is much wider and simpler than that.
Marching To A New Beat
For our family, the Fall is filled with Friday Night Lights, as our oldest child is a member of her high school marching band. While we certainly enjoy the football team's successes on the field, the process and progress of the marching band really captures our attention. From two-a-day practices in the August heat, to entering the stadium in line to the drummers' beat at each game, to practicing for the always-sold-out Patriotic Game?everything the band director does is designed to build his team into a synchronized unit performing at its highest possible talent level.
Harness Mind Chatter and Make it Work for You!
"When you talk to yourself, you listen. No matter what you say, you're listening... and recording it in your memory." - Mike Brescia
The Honor Roll of Life
All too often, people pursue a vision of material success at the expense of the other aspects of their beingness. In fact, our current culture is so plagued with this narrowness of vision, so focused on the material, that the soul of our society is in danger of being lost.
Top Ten Ways To Create Positive Behavior Change
1. Open your mind to new ideas: Positive behavior change has to start with your thoughts. Get excited about learning new methods, developing new skills and doing things differently. Anything else is "text-book insanity" ? that's when you do the same things the same way and expect different results.
What Is Success Anyway?
Success is creating what you want the way you want it to be.
Neutralize The Negatives!
We are repeatedly told that we should forget about unpleasant experiences (failures) and focus on pleasant ones (successes).
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